They knew that – some of them did. Some of them watched her, silently encouraging her to sit, sit and shut down. Not sit and be mindfully relaxed. They wanted her to sit and remove herself from the world. The others wanted her to be active – get the things she loved doing done. Relaxing was unnecessary. There was time to relax when she was old, decrepit, and basically dead. The rest, the small population hiding through and behind the others wanted her to cease to exist. Rebecca knew it. She could feel it weaving through the stares of the others. All of them moving silently through the air, tangled together, weighted down and unwilling to move from their corner.
It had started like a clown making a balloon animal.
There was the suspense of what the configuration would end up being: a dog, a horse, a princess crown, maybe even a sword. Because only in the world of balloon animals were a sword and a crown counted as such. While the pieces were all being built the imagination was free to form whatever ideas it could muster. Balloons being picked out of a large supply, stretched, warmed out, filled out. Then they were blown up – almost ready to form something larger than itself. Something that was supposed to bring joy to another person, regardless of their age or fears. Because even people afraid of balloons or clowns overlooked irrational fears when given a balloon animal. Right when everything was getting ready to come together, right as the shape was transitioning from an outline to an actually being that’s when the balloons popped, ending all of the fun.